They call me Nono

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Posts tagged with "Pirjo Zeylon"

Jun 6

Traditional theatre preformace in Kyoto, Japan. Warrior dancing. Two geishas preforming a dance.

Jun 3

I got a letter

Dear Myself (whoever you are),

I have noticed a lack of something, I don’t know if it is interest or commitment or what, but something is lacking. Are you loosing it? And you look like a star – don’t get me wrong, you are not that shiny thing, but your areas of interest are spread all over it is like you where going to this, that and whatever direction at once. Don’t you believe in anything? Like you just didn’t know in what world you belonged or what worse is, if you belong at all. Like you just pretend to live or as most live just half of it. This makes me a bit sad.

Oh you do a lot all the time – but is your heart in it? It isn’t, I can tell. Does world exist for you? Do you? Haven’t you proven that you can do whatever you want over and over? What more do you need to believe?

There is this constant pain inside your heart. The road of life you walk, it doesn’t give you peace. But is it peace you really want? You know this, don’t you, the learning part and the importance of walking the path? And the truth of spirituality, you can find it everywhere if you open your eyes to see. There is no real world out there – maybe this is the thing that makes you stumble now – the knowledge of what is real.

Oh, I know, you are longing, so much longing in this time. Diffuse and untouchable urge towards something. You know these times, don’t you? Times of change, on the threshold of manifestation.

So, please, you have been knocking on that door so many times before and not had the opportunity to open it, always something missing from the picture. You know that you will encounter everything you long for. Your business is just to understand what it is you see and experience. Those opportunities are often not what you expect them to be. You never know where it comes from. This trains your judging skill.

But the main thing for now seems to be your poor ability to limit the flow. Why do you have to open all the doors at once? You say; ‘be there job’ and you get so much you drown in it. You say;’ be there money’ and it seems to be given (because of the job, mainly). You say; ‘be there writing’ and your job comes in between. Ah, I think that we have found the cause of your longing. And I know darling one, you are longing for someone as well, someone special just for you. The part; ‘be there someone’ is avoiding you.

It doesn’t help you, to long. That special person might come along tomorrow already, and it might take five more years as well. You have lost your faith in that, haven’t you? Well, I don’t blame you. Because who am I kidding here – sitting here and writing to myself, trying to offer solace? So indeed, I know what you want, you want to move along, ahead.

This is the circle and we have come on its own end. The serpent biting its own tail. Just know this, the serpent doesn’t bite its own tail, it bites another serpents tail, you are moving ahead! I prey for you.

With all my love and devotion,

Your own Self

it dreamt me

.

i dip my hand in the river
it runs thru my fingers
adapting
accepting my bodily presence
exchanging temperature
cell-memoirs
this is more than air
less than land
it is all
and
it dreamt me
at times wondering
questioning why
would such a dream
become true?

.

Jun 1

i want

.

i want

erase the bodies

pretty bodies

ugly bodies

fat

skinny

pumped and pimped

i want them gone

release the essence

of me

of you

us all

would we love

one another

more?

see who we really are

.

from the ashes of my self

.

you broke my heart

bitch

you - that cute face of yours

and at the same time

you puzzled me

anew

blew a new spark in me

but now

I don’t know how to walk

flower power

.

no

it’s not snowing

white petals

of apple blossoms

tumbling through the air

intoxicating me

the scent

is their last sentence

of love

.

The last supper

Sandy squints his eyes at her:

"Magnolia, you are a piece of work."
"You think?"


The previous evening he’d found a slice of pepperoni pizza left on the porch and their airtight bin wide open by the driveway. It was pure luck the bears hadn’t paid a lethal visit. It didn’t stop there; she’d also left the gas on the other day. If Sandy hadn’t noticed the smell he might have blown himself up. He was happy to have been home alone. He didn’t want any outsiders to get in harms way.


"You have to pay more attention! I could’ve died. It’s wilderness out here for God’s sake."


”But you lived,” Magnolia says, slowly turning to Sandy who stands with his back to the wide bay window through which can be seen pine forests climbing the mountain behind their luxurious log cabin.


Sandy has been observing her intensely. His fist tightens until his knuckles show bone. Magnolia wets her lips, returns his stare and registers how he quivers. She touches the swollen bruise on her cheek she has tried to hide with makeup and takes a nervous breath. Her broken nose peeps faintly. Doctors have never been able to fix it.


And then Magnolia’s eyes turn to black stones you can find on the seashore, polished and glossy. Her gaze has captured a single dark car flashing through the trees as it crawls up from the valley. The hill is knife-edge steep and the road serpentine with many deep curves. Her sullen face lightens up like the sun surfacing on a cloudy day. She could cut the brake line of his car.


She fires a wide smile at Sandy that makes him relax and open his fists.


“Would you like some supper, Darling?”

___________________

This is my first attepmt to do some prose here, flash fiction so to say.

gaah

.

the stupidity

agony i cause upon myself

important password

disappeared

my webmail!

and the double loop

my personal wall of stone

resetting password mail

goes into

that ominous inbox

(pls don’t laugh, it hurt my feelings)

.

spring song

.

It’s awake

Longing

forsaken wind
blown in that glow
risen the fire
certainty
know this

he’s coming
he’s coming
he’s coming

I am here

my waiting ended
finished
so hurry my love
hurry please!

come and wake me

forgive me then if I cry
your touch
ridiculed me all this time
my being shouted
out for you

flame not at all expired
the ashes
of misunderstood love
covered it, protected

the wheel of life
is in its spring
again

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